


Know no peace

by Alyssa_Allyrion



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: AU, Angst, F/F, F/M, Intrigue, Slow Build, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-18
Updated: 2018-11-30
Packaged: 2019-08-25 07:58:19
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16657252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alyssa_Allyrion/pseuds/Alyssa_Allyrion
Summary: In an attempt to mend the relationship between the rest of the Seven Kingdoms and Dorne following the murder of Elia Martell and her children, Jon Arryn proposes that Ashara Dayne, cousin to Prince Doran Martell, marries Stannis Baratheon, the king's brother. Ashara accepts - but not because she is so keen on being the tool for mending the country's wounds. Instead, she hopes her position at court will allow her to find a way to obtain justice for Elia.She does not expect to fall in love.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I've started this fic in Russian many years ago and never posted, so here it is in English. 
> 
> N.B.: In this AU Ashara does not have the alleged stillborn child, and Edric Dayne is born four years earlier than in canon.

Despite the warmth of the night and the fire burning brightly in the chimney, Ashara still cannot help but feel cold – perhaps because this was the third night in the row that she could not sleep. The maester already offered her milk of the poppy, but Ashara firmly refused – the few times she’s had terrible nightmares. _I could not bear any more horrors these days._

Ashara stares at the logs in the fireplace, then looks to her bed. Her young sister – Allyria – is sleeping soundly surrounded by a mountain of pillow. Next to the bed stands a small crib, where her nephew, Edric, the new lord of Starfall, is sleeping. Ashara barely let the two of them out of her sight ever since Edric was born. _We are all that remains._

A plague swept through Starfall just but a few short months ago, claiming the life of her oldest brother, Alrick. _Some will whisper, of course, that the plague was our punishment…Why then did it claim Alrick and not Arthur?_ Her good-sister Alyna, struck with grief from the passing of her dear husband as well as the blood-chilling news from King’s Landing took to birthing bed too early. He maester said that nothing could have been done for her, but, miraculously, Edric was born healthy and survived. 

Ashara thinks back to holding Alyna’s hand as the life was leaving her good-sister. She can still feel Alyna’s cold fingers, in hers, can still see the exhausted look in her eyes. 

“Please make sure he grows up happy,” Alyna whispered before her strength left her, and Ashara swore on her mother’s grave that she would. 

_The fate is strange,_ Ashara thinks, _One moment you have everything and the next – it is all gone. My beloved brother, the two women who were my sisters in all but blood. All that remains is Allyria and Edric._

Ashara hears steps in the corridor, and the door opens. She turns around, irritated, putting the wineglass on the table. _Who would come in without permission?_ she wonders. After all, until Edric reaches majority she is to rule Starfall in his name. 

She turns to face the intruder – and, suddenly feels that there is no air in her lungs. _This cannot be._ He looks different now – gaunt and disheveled and like he had aged two decades over the two years she hasn’t seen him. 

They are looking at each other – neither one moving, neither one seemingly knowing what to say. Ashara has as many questions for Arthur as she has curses, but, somehow, nothing comes to mind. _Seeing one brother alive after you just buried another would bring a smile to anyone’s face,_ Ashara thinks, grimly, _But not to mine. Traitor._

The silence is dense and heavy around them, and it seems Arthur cannot take it anymore. 

“Ashara,” he says. 

The sound of his voice fills Ashara with rage. _Why didn’t you protect Elia and her children?_ she wants to scream at Arthur, _Where were you when they needed you? How dare you show your face here after all this time?_ But she remains quiet – her voice is hoarse already from tears and grieving and he does not deserve her emotion. 

Ashara feels her head spin. _If he is not dead, might it be that…_ Princess Elia had shared her thoughts on why three knights of Kingsguard went missing together with prince Rhaegar one day. Ashara hoped that Elia was mistaken; yet here stood the living proof that she was not. 

Ashara notices that Arthur refuses to meet her gaze. The room is dark, but even in the darkness she can see that his white cloak is all grey from dirt and dust and that there are scratches on his face. _Just what have you been up to, brother?_

Arthur looks around the room – all to avoid looking into Ashara’s eyes. As his gaze falls to the bed a haunted, horrified look appears on his face. Ashara understands why, as night has played the same tricks on her before. In the darkness Allyria’s dark curls concealing half her face turned her into Princess Rhaenys and Edric’s pale blond hair made him Prince Aegon. 

When Ashara turns to Arthur again, his face is ridden with guilt. _Good._ If her brother was in King’s Landing when the sack occurred, he could have been able to save Princess Elia and her children from their fate. _Why weren’t you, brother? What was more important to you than that?_

“I need a midwife,” Arthur says suddenly. 

Ashara is startled by his request. _A midwife?_ She wants to laugh in his face. _He has been away all this months doing gods know what and now he shows up to our ancestral home asking for a midwife._

“A midwife?” she repeats mockingly, breaking her silence, “Why brother I really should not be surprised that you have broken that vow too – honor is quite cheap these days, I see.”

“I haven’t come here to argue,” Arthur starts, but Ashara interrupts him.

“No, of course not – instead you’ve come here to make demands of me. Shall I remind you brother, dearest, that this is not your home anymore – that you have no right to ask anything of me.”

“You are right,” Arthur responds after a long pause, in a voice that is surprisingly soft, “But a woman may die if there is no midwife. I have never thought you so cruel to let someone die.”

_Then you did not know me at all, did you brother? Same as, it appears, I did not know you._

“And I regret not recognizing right away just how cruel you were – and treacherous too. Those vows you swore to protect the king – and yet you were nowhere near King’s Landing when the king, when Princess Elia and Aegon and Rhaenys were murdered in cold blood. I can see you are still wearing your white cloak even though Robert Baratheon sits the Iron Throne and he has named others to his Kingsguard. Pray tell me, brother, why are you not on Dragonstone defending Queen Rhaella and King Viserys. What are you doing here?”

The answer is now obvious to Ashara, but she wants to hear the words from Arthur himself. _Elia was right in her guesses._ Though they never thought that Rhaegar would dare bring his whore here, to Dorne. Rage burns hot is Ashara’s chest. _How dare that fool insult Elia so?_

She looks to Arthur and her rage only burns hotter. Rhaegar was a worthless, useless piece of garbage who could not even manage Dragonstone’s affairs leaving them to his lady wife and his steward, but her brother – a man who she thought was good and noble – stood by Rhaegar, allowing him to insult Elia so, to insult their homeland. _How could he?_

Suddenly Arthur drops to his knees, arms outstretched towards Ashara. 

“Ashara, please, for the love you have for me once, I beg you – let me take one of the midwives with me. So much depends on it.”

Ashara looks at Arthur as he is standing on his knees and all she can feel is disgust. 

“Very well you shall have your midwife, but first, I shall have you answer me – what are you dong here, in Dorne? What can be more important than protecting king Viserys and queen Rhaella?”

“I fear I could not explain even if I tried,” Arthur tells her then after a short pause, “But all you need to know is that the very fate of the world depends on it. He did it to protect the kingdom, to protect all of us.”

“And yet the realm bleeds and countless people are dead. Seems he has doomed all of us instead,” Ashara replies. 

“You do not understand – this is bigger than any of us – then me, than you, than Prince Rhaegar or Princess Elia…”

“Don’t you dare,” Ashara cuts him off. 

“You can take Becca with you wherever it is you are going – but make sure you return her here safely, or I swear by the old gods and the new that I will hunt you through the seven hells.”

“You have my word,” Arthur tells her as he gets up. 

“A worthless thing to have,” Ashara scoffs. 

Arthur turns around to walk out of the rooms, but stops in the doorway. 

“Do not send anyone to follow us,” he tells her before he leaves. 

Ashara says nothing and as soon as he is gone summons one of the servants she had used for spying before.

“After ser Arthur and Becca leave follow them to find out where they are headed. Make sure you are not caught.”

Three days later the servant returns with news.  
“Ser Arthur brought the midwife to a tower in the Prince’s Pass, just north of Kingsgrave.”

Ashara thanks him and heads to her study to write a letter. Words do not come easy to her as she knows the letter will likely be the end for her brother. But someone has to stop this madness. She wonders if she should grieve – but Arthur sealed his own fate long ago and she’s already grieved for him when she thought him dead before. _I have no tears left for him._

When Ned Stark comes to Starfall carrying her brother’s sword she is anything but surprised. The war changed him – all boyish softness left his features, and now a solemn and sad man stood before her. The sad longing she saw in his eyes whenever he looked at her made Ashara’s hear clench. 

She longed for the simpler times too – for that night long ago at Harrenhall when they were both younger, when they thought the spring had come, when the foolish words and promises were spoken and a single kiss was exchanged. 

But those times were gone now – he wasn’t just a boy anymore, he was lord Eddard Stark, the Warden of North, a married man and her brother’s killer. _There is nothing left for us._

He brings a child with him to Starfall as well, and though he claims it is his bastard son, it take Ashara one look to tell that he is lying, but she allows him to have his lie. 

“I have torn down the tower,” he tells her, “to make graves for Ser Arthur and his brothers as well as my companions.”

“Good,” Ashara nods, upon hearing that, “That cursed place should not stand any longer.”

He departs Starfall soon – perhaps because he fears the rumors or, perhaps, because he feels guilty. As much as Ashara does not want to, she agrees to send a wet nurse with him – she is not a cruel woman, after all. 

In the months that followed Ashara fully devotes herself to affairs of Starfall in an attempt to regain the sense of normalcy. When she is not attending to the matters of governing, Ashara spends her time with Allyria and Edric, joyous about the fact that both of them are growing happy and healthy. 

The letter that arrives from Sunspear one day is a surprise for Ashara. Prince Doran writes to her himself, asking her to come to Water Gardens to meet with him. Ashara does not want to delay her visit, but a part of her feels fear – she does not know how she can ever face Prince Doran – or worse Prince Oberyn. The grief that Ashara felt about Elia and Aegon and Rhaenys’s deaths was immense, but, she feared that only seeing the pain Elia’s brothers were feeling might kill her. 

Nonetheless she takes a ship from Starfall to Water Gardens, where Prince Doran is expecting her. He looks much more gaunt since last she saw him, but she is sure that she, too, is a pale shadow of herself from just a year ago. 

Prince Doran’s eyes are sad, yet he smiles softly at Ashara as he offers her tea and sweets. The sweets are her favorite since her childhood and she is surprised he remembers. _I truly should not be – Prince Doran has a remarkable memory._

Ashara tries not to look around too much – she and Elia and Alyna spent so much time here as children, that wherever she’d look she could close her eyes and summon the image of the three of them being there. That hurts, so Ashara tries to focus on Prince Doran and the conversation instead. 

“I have received a word from King’s Landing from lord Arryn,” Prince Doran starts and Ashara wonders what the Hand of the King has to do with her, “He appears to think it is possible to mend the relationships between Dorne and the rest of the Seven Kingdoms through marriage, rather through granting justice for Elia, Rhaenys and Aegon by punishing the murderers.”

Ashara feels rage in her chest. _Lord Arryn truly must be a fool to think that that would work._

“And that is the reason I have summoned you here – it is your hand that Lord Arryn was trying to ask for. He plans to wed you to the king’s brother, lord Stannis.”

A nervous laughter comes up and dies in Ashara’s throat. _He wants me to marry a Baratheon?_

“He seemed to have hoped to arrange Arianne’s betrothal to Renly Baratheon at first, but seeing as Renly is now the Lord of Storm’s End, that would not have worked – I will not have Arianne give up her birthright for his match. So he asked for you, seeing as you are our cousin. The king’s envoy should arrive at Sunspear soon,” Prince Dorna looked into her eyes, “Ashara, I ask you not to refuse to offer.”

Ashara is at loss for words. _Surely he cannot be seriously considering that._

“My Prince,” she starts, “How can you ask me to marry a brother of a man who rewarded Princess Elia’s murder with a royal marriage?”

“I cannot,” says Prince Doran, “Yet I do. You are within your rights to refuse, I understand the enormity of my asking, but I have called you here to Water Gardens to explain to you why I do not think you should refuse the match.”

Ashara looks at him, waiting for his words. 

“Since the day they brought me the news of Elia’s death, I have been working on the downfall of Tywin Lannister. I believe if you were at court as the wife of the king’s brother, that would allow us to get justice for Elia sooner than I’d ever hoped”

The words of protest die in Ashara’s throat upon hearing those words. _I would do anything for her._

The sun sat and rose again before Prince Doran finished confiding in Ashara his plan. She feels reassured, confident and determined after hearing his words.  
“And to you other concern,” Prince Doran tells Ashara, as she takes a sip of her tea, “Stannis is no Robert. The man is serious, stubborn and dutiful – and how not? The man held down Storm’s End for over a year with just a handful of men and no food. You may not like him, but trust me – it is possible to do much worse for a husband.”

When Ashara leaves Water Gardens she does so with a heavy heart. 

The envoy from the king arrives to Starfall not too long after her return to ask for her hand for the king’s brother, Lord Stannis. Ashara acts surprised, asking for time – and in three days informs them that she agrees to the match. It is not till the agreement is reached that she wonders to herself if she could actually bear the marriage that she agreed to. A second later she reminds herself of the fate of Elia and her children. _I will do everything I can so that they have justice._

Preparations for departure are brief. While Ashara knows that the best would be to leave Allyria and Edric at Starfall, she finds she cannot bear to be separated with them. So she writes to her intended husband, asking for permission to bring her sister and nephew with her. His answer is affirmative, of course – most men attempt to be in their brides’ good graces before the marriage. 

It dawns fair and clear on the day that Ashara boards the ship to Storm’s End with Edric and Allyria. Her heart clenches when she looks at the Palestone Sword tower.

_Who knows how long it will be till I see it again?_


	2. Chapter 2

Ashara has never seen any castle that could rival the Storm’s End in strength. With its massive curtain wall and a colossal drum tower, there must have been magic involved in its creation. 

“I’ve heard the spells were woven into the castle walls, to prevent winds from affecting the castle,” Ashara suddenly recalled Alyna tell her on a night log ago at Water Gardens. She scoffed then upon hearing her cousin’s words. _Of course Alyna would listen to the tales and legends,_ Ashara thought back then. 

However, now that she found herself at Storm’s End, Ashara thought that maybe she should not have dismissed Alyna’s words so easily. The White Sword tower of Starfall always seemed immense to Ashara, but compared to the tower of Storm’s End it was positively dainty. 

The castle was so large that, despite Ashara spending a fortnight at Storm’s End, she still did not have a chance to see all of it. She’d spend the majority of her days in a small inner garden with Allyria and Edric. 

“So, what do you think about Storm’s End?” Ashara asked Allyria once as they were sitting on a wooden bench in the yard. 

“I like it here,” Allyria told her then, with a bright smile, “Because it is not hot.”

Ashara smiled then, running her hand through Allyria’s hair. 

Her sister was right – the weather in the Stormlands was significantly more temperate than the weather in Dorne, and while Ashara missed the heat, Allyria seemed to have preferred milder climates. 

“My lady,” one of her maids, Hildy, said, “It may be time for you to head back to get prepared for the midday meal.”

“You are right,” Ashara nodded, getting up from the bench, “It would not be proper to leave my betrothed waiting.”

Ashara did not quite know what to make of her betrothed. To her own surprise, Ashara found him rather pleasing to her eyes – Stannis was tall and sinewy and had dark blue eyes and black hair. He was kind enough she knew that – he’d let her bring Allyria and Edric with her to Storm’s End. In the two weeks that she stayed in this castle she’d also learned that he did not like speaking much, which Ashara viewed as a blessing. _It is his luck he is not boastful – had he tried to tell me of house Baratheon’s “glorious” victory in war, had he dared breathe a bad word about Elia or her children, I swear by the Seven I would have killed him._

In fact, her future lord husband did not speak of the war at all, and Ashara was grateful for that. _He must have horrifying memories of it,_ Ashara thought, as she remembered hearing about the Siege of Storm’s End. The siege laid by lord Mace Tyrell lasted a year, and, although unsuccessful, forced the inhabitants of Storm’s End to nearly starve. 

_Perhaps that is the reason why the Tyrells are not invited to the wedding,_ Ashara thought, _Or the Usurper was trying to teach them a lesson._

Ashara had no delusions about the fact that Robert Baratheon was likely less than thrilled with marrying his own brother to a Dornishwoman. But, as Prince Doran told her, Jon Arryn likely explained to him that amends needed to be made with Dorne for the murder of Princess Elia. _As if this – or any – wedding could achieve that._ It gave Ashara a strange sense of satisfaction knowing that Robert Baratheon will not enjoy this wedding. 

The royal retinue was set to arrive at Strom’s End in a fortnight, with the wedding happening in a moon’s turn. Based on Prince Doran’s words to her, Ashara was expecting both him and Prince Oberyn at the wedding, but according to Prince Doran’s recent letter, only he and lady Mellario would be attending, as Oberyn had unexpectedly taken much longer to return from his trip to the Free Cities. That did not surprise Ashara. _If Prince Oberyn were to attend, someone from the Baratheon-Lannister retinue would be dead. Prince Doran does not want that, of course. Not yet._

Ashara sat by the mirror in her rooms as Hildy put up her hair with black ribbons. Ashara tried to watch Hildy’s work and not stare at her own face in the mirror. There was a time when she loved nothing better than looking at her own reflection, enjoying her beauty. Now, however, looking at the mirror made her nervous – because she felt like she could not escape the haunted look that she saw in her own eyes. 

As soon as Hildy was done, Ashara got up and headed to lord Stannis’s solar. He was already waiting for her there. The large table in the middle of the room was set up for a mid-day meal. 

“My lord,” Ashara greeted him. 

“My lady,” he said, nodding to her. 

As Ashara sat down, there was silence. She was not sure if he expected her to start the conversation or if he was going to say something. 

“You look radiant today, my lady,” Stannis suddenly said with an almost pained expression. Ashara had to stop herself from laughing. In the short time she’d lived in Storm’s End she’s learned that her future lord husband was not a man of easy courtesies. _Someone must have told him that this is what he needs to tell his betrothed. Perhaps it was even that advisor of his, ser Davos._

“You are too kind, my lord,” she answered, lowering her gaze, as was expected of her. 

The food was brought in – the chicken stew to start the meal and lamprey for the main course. One thing that surprised after she arrived at Storm’s End Ashara was that lord Stannis seemed to have preferred rather simple food. Ashara visited quite a few castles in her time, large and small, and most lords liked to feast on finest things. _Even if they could not afford it. Perhaps it is smart to lead a more simple life._

Feeling that it was her turn to talk, Ashara said, “His Grace’s retinue is arriving within a fortnight. You must be quite pleased, my lord, to see your brother at last.”  
The expression on Stannis’s face was hard to read, but the emotion on it was anything but excitement. _Does he not want to see his brother?_ Ashara wondered to herself. 

“Yes, Robert will be arriving shorty,” Stannis said, after a pause, “I do not think my brother missed me much.”

The rest of the meal both Ashara and Stannis were silent. It was only when Ashara was about to ask his leave to go back to her rooms, that Stannis looked her in the face and said, “How are you adjusting to Storm’s End? I imagine it is quite different from Starfall.”

“It is, my lord, but I like it here very much and it is a magnificent castle,” Ashara replied to him, meeting his gaze, “I would be happy to spend the rest of my days here, by your side.”

“And your sister and nephew, how are they liking it?” Stannis continued. 

“Just earlier today my sister confessed to me that she quite enjoys the more moderate climate here,” Ashara answered with a soft smile, “And Edric is just a babe – he would like anywhere where he was warm and fed.”

Time that seemed to pass slowly after Ashara’s arrival at Storm’s End suddenly sped up after the arrival of the king’s retinue and all the chaos that that brought. Ashara could tell that Stannis was surprisingly displeased with having his brother visit him. 

Queen Cersei meanwhile did not seem to take a liking to Storm’s End at all – she would spend most of her time in her rooms, only showing up for two feasts in the entire fortnight. At the second feast Ashara was seated next to her, and when she turned to make pleasant conversation, Ashara noticed a large bruise on the side of her neck, aptly concealed by her hair and the collar of her dress. 

_Does he beat her?_ Ashara wondered, looking over to Robert who was very deep in his cups and loudly roaring some old song. Suddenly Ashara’s mind was filled with images of bruises on pale skin – the ones King Aerys used to leave on Queen Rhaella. _Does the Iron Throne make men monsters? Or are they monsters to begin with?_

The day of the wedding arrived surprisingly quickly. Ashara had barely gotten any sleep the night before and woke up before the crack of dawn. She felt strange nervousness. _I need to be calm, I need to be brave. For Elia, and Rhaenys, and Aegon,_ she told herself. The maids drew her a bath, and Ashara spent a while enjoying the feeling of hot water upon her skin. 

One of the maids washed and then brushed her hair. _It is good that I awoke so early,_ Ashara thought, _My hair needs to dry before it can be styled._ After she got out of the bathtub, she sat by the hearth, waiting for her hair to dry. 

Her wedding dress was made of silver silk and samite. Once her maids helped Ashara put it on and brought her to the mirror she could not contain a smile – for a moment it felt like she was once again a young maid who was just realizing her own beauty. Ashara found herself yearning for those simple times. Her hair was put up with silk silver ribbons. Once that was done she put on a necklace and earrings – a present from her future lord husband – made of silver and deep purple amethyst, which brought out Ashara’s purple eyes.  
_This dress should go well with my maiden cloak,_ Ashara thought, _But not with house Baratheon colors._

Once her maiden’s cloak was on her shoulders, Ashara headed to the sept accompanied by a few of Storm’s End guards. 

The Storm’s End sept was filled with people. Ashara’s eyes were searching the crowd for the familiar faces. _And there they are._ In the crowd she saw Prince Doran and lady Mellario, as well as lady Blackmont and lady Vaith, lord Yronwood and Uller. 

Her betrothed was standing in front of the septon, waiting for her. As she approached him, Ashara wondered to herself what their life would be like. _I suppose I shall find out soon enough._

The septon began the wedding ceremony. It felt strange to Ashara – to be the one getting married. She had attended so many weddings and yet has never pictured herself in place of the bride. 

The time came for exchanging vows. Ashara obediently repeated the words of the wedding vows after the septon and then came Stannis’s turn. 

As she spoke, Ashara started to feel strange – it felt like she could trust his words. She wondered if that was the look in the deep blue eyes of his, so full of determination, or in a powerful tone of his voice, but when he swore to protect her and to honor, her she did not have a doubt that he would do just that. 

The kiss they shared was quick, yet almost soft, which had surprised Ashara. _I wonder if he had kissed anyone before,_ she thought. 

After the oaths were exchanged and Ashara’s maiden cloak of purple and silver was replaced by heavy black-velvet-and-gold one, the people started leaving the sept to head to the great hall of the castle where the feast was beginning. 

The feast was still going till the early hours of the morning. Ashara was extremely grateful about the fact that King Robert and Queen Cersei were seated at another end of the high table, because the drunker Robert got, the more handsy he became with the serving women and the ladies alike. Ashara could tell that this behavior annoyed her new lord husband as he gritted his teeth, but did not say anything. 

Queen Cersei did seem quite irritated with Robert’s behavior as well, as she had excused herself from the wedding feast early. Robert clearly did not understand – or maybe did not care – that it was his behavior that made his wife leave, and continued merrily fondling serving girls. 

Once he was deep in his cups, Robert suddenly got up. 

“Stannis, brother, I am so happy you are finally married,” Robert said loudly enough to get everyone else in the great hall to be quiet, despite the fact that he was almost slurring from how drunk he was, “And as my wedding gift, I want to name you the Lord of Dragonstone. You are now the head of house Baratheon of Dragonstone.”  
Color left Ashara’s face. _No. No, this cannot be._ Ashara never wanted to come back to Dragonstone. _I could not bear it. Not after spending so much time there with Elia and Rhaenys and Aegon…_

She heard her husband grit his teeth again. He looked clearly irritated, but after turning to her and seeing how pale she’s gotten, he started looking downright angry. Nevertheless, he could not argue with the king. 

“Thank you, Your Grace,” Stannis chocked out as if every word was a bone in his throat. 

Ashara did not know why Robert would do that. _Stormlands are much richer than Dragonstone,_ she thought, _Is he trying to keep Storm’s End for his son?_ Perhaps that was it – after all Targaryens granted Dragonstone to their heirs, but it was unlikely Robert would want to keep with that tradition. _Although technically Stannis is his heir._

The prospective of moving to Dragonstone filled Ashara with fear. _I cannot go back, not after… No._ But, it appeared she did not have a choice. _No,_ she told herself, trying to calm down, _I need to be strong for Elia._

The feast ended rather soon afterwards when someone called out that it was the time for bedding ceremony. Ashara was almost grateful – she did not want anyone knowing about her fears regarding return to Dragonstone, and it was all too easy for everyone to assume that the bride simply feared the bedding. 

She was not too happy about the tearing of her beautiful wedding dress, but she was quite relieved to finally be in the bedroom alone with her new lord husband. Some people, namely king Robert, took a few too many liberties when disrobing her, which angered Ashara. 

_He will pay for it – and for everything else – in due time._

Her lord husband was standing next to the bed and Ashara made her way to him. She felt goosebumps on her skin from the chilly air of the room – for some reason there was no fire in the heart. _Why am I suddenly feeling so shy?_ she wondered. 

There was an awkward pause before both of them got onto bed without exchanging the word, and then there was another pause. _I should kiss him,_ Ashara thought, _Perhaps that could make this less awkward._

The kiss was soft, softer than the one they exchanged at the wedding, and Ashara began feeling less nervous. The coupling that followed was rather brief and clumsy, but somehow sweet and almost delicate. 

_Must have been his first,_ Ashara thought, looking at her new lord husband, lying in bed beside her. It was hers too, but it was quite rare to find a man of his age who has never lain with a woman. 

From the quietness behind the door Ashara could tell that the rowdy crowd that carried then to the bedding has gotten tired from yelling improprieties and has likely returned to the great hall to continue feasting.  
“You do not wish to live on Dragonstone, do you? I’ve seen it in your face” Stannis suddenly asked. 

Ashara turned to him. 

“No, my lord, I do not,” for a moment she wondered if she should tell him her reason, “You know I have served princess Elia for many years, including when she lived on Dragonstone. I could not bear…” Ashara felt her voice break. _I must not cry._

“I understand. I shall petition Robert in the morrow – or when His Grace decides to stop celebrating to reconsider his decision. I’m sure he had made it only because he was so deep in his cups.”

“Thank you, my lord,” Ashara said, feeling a wave of gratitude toward her lord husband. _If he could convince him, that would be wonderful._ She wondered if she should kiss him, but he shifted onto his side, settling in to sleep. 

_Perhaps this marriage will go better than I thought._


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Sexual content

Nothing was solved in the morning, not that Ashara expected it to be. Her lord husband had gone to speak with King Robert, but, it appeared, his requests were to no avail, as the king insisted that he did, in fact, intend to grant Dragonstone to lord Stannis. As Ashara learned later, to make the matters worse he had granted Storm’s End to his and lord Stannis younger brother, Renly, who was but a young child. 

“We shall be departing for Dragonstone as soon as the king and his retinue return leave for King’s Landing,” lord Stannis told in a stiff voice her when she saw him later in the afternoon. 

She could tell he was affected by the king’s decision. _And who wouldn’t be._ It seemed quite the insult – granting the richer Stormlands to a child who will rule in his own right in more than a decade, while forcing Stannis to leave the ancestral home behind and move into Targaryen stronghold. _Especially the one so dreadful as Dragonstone._

Apart form all the memories that living on Dragonstone would bring, the other reason why Ashara did not want to return there was because she could not do almost anything she liked there. Her favorite pastimes were hunting and hawking as well as horse-riding, but there were no forests on Dragonstone, and most of the terrain was unsuitable for the horses. 

_But I must endure._

Ashara looked over to her lord husband, who stood right in front of her, somber and stiff. She wondered if, perhaps, she should behave the way she thought a proper wife should – and offer a comforting touch to him. However, when she stretched out her hand lord Stannis seemed to shy away from her gesture. _Does he dislike being touched?_ Ashara wondered to herself. She did not get that impression last night, but, maybe she was not paying enough attention. Besides, if she had learned anything about her lord husband in the time that she had spend around him, it was that he was dutiful.

 _So maybe he just had to grit his teeth and bear it last night,_ Ashara thought, somberly. The thought had made her feel strangely uncomfortable – she’s met many a woman who she knew had to do just that, but had never met a man who would complain of having to do that. _Surely it cannot be that intolerable,_ Ashara thought, starting to feel almost insulted. She _knew_ she was beautiful. _Many a man would have been thanking the Seven to be in his place,_ she thought, irritated. 

The Usurper and his retinue were to remain in Storm’s End for another fortnight. Ashara attempted to avoid the guests as much as it was appropriate and fully submerged herself into preparing for moving to Dragonstone. She considered momentarily sending Allyria and Edric back to Starfall, as Dragonstone was not the best place for children. But looking at Edric and Allyria, she could not find it in her heart to do that. 

One of the things Ashara realized that she needed to do was to find lady companions. Previously she’d never thought about that, as from her early years she was a companion to Princess Elia. But Elia was dead and she was a wife to the new king’s brother, and it was only proper for her to have her own lady companions.

So Ashara set out to write letters. The first one was destined for her old acquaintance Elaena Velaryon. Ashara had some concerns about inviting one of Elia’s former ladies as her own lady-in-waiting, however, her desire to have someone who’d _understand_ won over her desire to be careful. _Besides, my lord husband is not the lord of Dragonstone, and house Velaryon is sworn to Dragonstone, so that would not be improper._

The second one was addressed to Elissa Celtigar, sister of the ruling lord Celtigar. Elia had once considered making lady Elissa one of her ladies-in-waiting, but the rebellion broke out, interfering with her plans. 

_And that would be all,_ Ashara thought, _Two should be enough._

She would have gladly invited the sweet and pious Aelinor Sunglass to be one of her ladies, since Aelinor served Elia so very well. But Aelinor’s thrice cursed father forced her into the Silent Sisters - all for the terrible crime of being in love with the third son of one of her father’s bannermen. _Nothing had ever transpired between the two of them, and yet her lord father thought that feelings alone were a crime._

The day the king Robert and his retinue were returning to King’s Landing could not have come soon enough. Only when the last guests have departed the Storm’s End Ashara could take a deep, calm breath. 

_I pray to gods that Doran’s plan will work – otherwise we broke bread with the man whose hands are covered in blood od Elia, Rhaenys and Aegon all for nothing,_ Ashara thought, then stopped herself, _No, I must have faith._

Ashara noticed that her lord husband had not attempted to share bed with her a single time since the wedding night. This behavior made her irritated – it is not that she wanted to share bed with him, but she was his lady wife and she knew she was beautiful. _Does he not think me beautiful?_ she suddenly found herself wondering. The thought did little to endear her lord husband to her. 

The final preparations were to take a week longer than expected. While Ashara, her lord husband, Edric and Allyria were departing for Dragonstone, Renly was to remain in Storm’s End, seeing as he was the new lord of Storm’s End. Ashara thought that there would be no harm in bringing him along, at least for a few years since he was but a child, but her lord husband seemed to have different beliefs, and Ashara decided not to argue. _It is his brother, after all,_ Ashara thought to herself. 

The ship that carried them to Dragonstone was much larger and was moving significantly faster than any ships Ashara had ever been on. From what Ashara heard the design was a special technique mostly employed in Braavos, but Storm’s End had hired a few Braavosi ship builders to recreate these ships here, in Westeros. The journey from Storm’s End to Dragonstone that would have normally taken a week would now be completed in just five days. 

And, just as the sailors had told her, on the evening of the fifth day Ashara saw the black looming shadow of Dragonstone’s castle on the horizon. The sight filled her very being with dread, but Ashara knew that she needed to steel her heart. And yet, despite her best efforts, she was not able to stop shaking. 

Walking through the dimly lit halls of Dragonstone, Ashara had to take slow, deep breaths in order to calm herself down. She had absolutely refused to live in the chambers of the Lady of Dragonstone – in her mind, those were the chambers where Princess Elia lived, where Queen Rhaella died. No one insisted, and so Ashara took one of the larger chambers on the east side of the castle. 

After ensuring that Edric and Allyria were both settled into the nursery, Ashara returned to her chambers. A maid, Kyra, helped her get out of her traveling dressed, and drew her a warm bath. Even seating in hot water with a fire burning brightly in the fireplace, Ashara still felt cold. Once out of the bathtub she got into the bed – and yet even the massive comforters and soft blankets could not make her feel any warmer. 

Through the night Ashara could not sleep even for a moment – as soon as she closed her eyes it felt like she was hearing stage whispers and that bizarre shadows were darting across the room. Time and time again she sat up in bed, panting. _Why am I so scared?_ she wondered, at the same time pushing away the very thoughts that made her scared. 

Whenever she closed her eyes, however, the images of horror started to overwhelm her. She saw her princess…Elia in a pool of blood with a broken skull, red ruins of Aegon and Rhaenys, Queen Rhaella looking white as the snow fro exsanguination. Ashara saw many more terrible things, each of which left her completely distressed. 

The second night was hardly better, and so Ashara did not sleep at all for two days. Her lord husband seemed to have noticed that something was amiss. 

“It does not look like you have gotten much rest since we have arrived here, my lady,” lord Stannis told her as they were eating the midday meal together. 

“No, my lord,” Ashara answered, too tired to even come up with an excuse. 

“The winds here blow much louder than at Storm’s End,” he offered, and Ashara felt grateful for the excuse that had readily presented itself. 

“It is, my lord. That is why I could not sleep,” she said.

Later that night when Ashara was putting Allyria and Edric to sleep in the nursery, Allyria asked, “Can you please lay with me for a little bit? It’s scary to fall asleep alone.”

Ashara laid in bed by Allyria’s side, hugging her sister closely. Suddenly she felt so very tired and decided that she would close her eyes – if only for a moment to rest them. Next thing she knew – she was woken up by Allyria because it was already the next morning. 

_How strange,_ Ashara thought, perplexed by the fact that the strange dreams were not bothering her anymore. 

At night, when Allyria asked Ashara to stay with her for a little while again Ashara happily obliged – and once again found herself sleeping in the nursery till the next morning without having any of the bad dreams. 

Realizing that she could not spend every night in the nursery to make sure that she does not have nightmares, Ashara started thinking of the ways in which she could sleep in her own room without the bad dreams. _Perhaps I should try to get my lord husband to remain with me – after all, it seems I do not have the nightmares when someone else is in the room._

They still have not shared a bed since the wedding night, and, given the way her lord husband comported himself, Ashara positively had no idea of how she was going to bring up the subject of them sleeping together that night. Nonetheless, the desire to get a good night’s sleep won over any awkwardness that Ashara may have been feeling. 

“My lord,” Ashara started carefully as they were having dinner together, just the two of them, in her lord husband’s solar, “I…” she paused, trying to look flustered. 

“Yes?” Stannis said, looking to her. Somehow under the look of his blue eyes Ashara did start feeling like she was getting flustered. 

She paused for a moment, trying to find the perfect words that would sound just shy enough to come from a proper wife, but also just clear enough that he would understand her meaning.

“I was hoping…I mean – it is my duty to bear you a son and an heir, my lord. I am afraid that may take a while if the two of us do not share the bed somewhat regularly,” Ashara did not mean to, but she actually started to feel blush rise to her cheeks. To ensure that she looked sufficiently shy, she quickly lowered her gaze and then slowly looked back up to her lord husband, who appeared to listen to her quite attentively. Feeling bolder, she continued, “All I want is to do my duty by you, my lord. So I was hoping you would grace my chambers with your presence tonight.”

There was a long pause. Ashara could not quite read her lord husband’s face – she had no hope of guessing what lord Stannis was thinking about. 

As the pause was getting longer, a part of Ashara thought that, perhaps, it would be wise to apologize for her boldness, and then excuse herself. 

However, before she got the chance, Stannis suddenly said, “Very well, my lady. I shall visit your chambers later tonight.”

Ashara could not believe that he agreed – by the look on his face she was starting to feel that he would refuse. However, now that he had agreed, as soon as the dinner ended she headed into her chambers and had Kyra draw her a bath. Ashara did not wash her hair this time – she’d only washed it yesterday and there was no way in which it would dry before her lord husband was to visit. 

Once she got out of the bath, Ashara put on her nightgown and settled in one of the chairs in front of the fireplace. Somehow the thought of her lord husband coming to her chambers was making her nervous – she did not feel that way the first night they have shared a bed. But then again that was after the wedding feast when she’d already had quite a few glasses of wine. 

Spotting a pitcher of wine on the table, Ashara poured herself out a glass. _Why am I so worried, we have done this before?_  
Her lord husband came into the chambers fairly soon and Ashara got up from the chair to greet him. They shared a brief kiss after which Stannis walked over to the bed, and Ashara followed his lead. He stood at the left side of the bed, and started to get undressed, and so did Ashara after momentary hesitation. 

As soon as they were both under on the bed under the covers Ashara kissed her lord husband with a long, slow kiss. Once the kiss was over, she looked to him expecting him to do anything, to touch or caress her, but he did not. He seemed somewhat uncomfortable by what was going on, but also like he was completely unsure of what to do. 

Ashara leaned in to kiss him again, then ran her hand down his back, hoping he would follow her example. He did, somewhat, – she felt the stiff touch of his hand on her back. _I suppose that’s a progress._

Soon enough he was right above her – as he began pushing in, Ashara felt discomfort, which must have shown on her face, as he stopped immediately. 

“Did I hurt you, my lady?” he asked, concerned. 

“I just…wasn’t quite ready,” Ashara said, “Could you go slow, until I get more comfortable?”

He nodded – and obliged. 

After it was all over the two of them were laying side by side, her lord husband looked over to Ashara. 

“Is there…” Ashara could see in Stannis’s face that he was feeling awkward and having a difficult time picking words, “Is there a way to make sure you are not uncomfortable? I would never want to hurt you, my lady.”

The question almost made Ashara chuckle. She grew up around Oberyn Martell – of course she had heard of a thousand ways to make sure the woman is not _uncomfortable._

_But I probably should not tell him about all of them at once – that would probably scare him. So let’s begin with something innocent._

“It would help me, my lord, if we could kiss or a little longer before we…” Ashara smiled the shy smile that she had perfected in her years at court, “And also if you would caress me a little beforehand.”

_If I have to share bed with him for the next Seven know how many years, I suppose, it would be good to make sure it is at least tolerable._

The expression on her lord husband’s face made Ashara want to smile. He was listening so attentively that Ashara began to suspect he may have been taking notes under the comforter. 

Once she stopped talking, he sat up and got out of bed to get dressed. 

“Good night, my lady,” he said as he was about to head for the door. 

“My lord, I was hoping you could indulge me some more,” Ashara smiled a small smile at him, “And stay with me tonight. I have been feeling quite cold in this room all alone because of the wind recently – not even fire in the fireplace or warm comforters help.”

“Why should I stay here then?” Stannis asked Ashara, looking into her face. 

_Ah, now I see how little he cares for his lady wife’s comfort…_

“Get dressed, my lady,” Stannis added suddenly, “I shall not have my lady wife sleeping in the cold – you shall come along with me to my rooms.”

_Perhaps I have misjudged him._


End file.
